Author Topic: REALLY Bad Jokes (Read 169504 times)

Steve T · « **Reply #960 on:** December 03, 2021, 14:55:27 »

. . . . . The rest will go to charity.

I'd to read that twice before the thruppenny bit dropped

kwackboy · « **Reply #961 on:** December 03, 2021, 16:29:31 »

mr_diver · « **Reply #962 on:** December 06, 2021, 13:52:23 »

MartinW · « **Reply #963 on:** December 06, 2021, 13:57:35 »

That caused so much grief last year, so hold on to your hats.

mr_diver · « **Reply #964 on:** December 06, 2021, 13:59:52 »

good news for those of us in Wales...

Free firewood!!!!

Mr Nick · « **Reply #965 on:** December 06, 2021, 14:49:56 »

They could at least make them half decent sized trees: that's barely even a matchstick.

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #966 on:** December 06, 2021, 15:19:19 »

If a drummer comes out of retirement will there be repercussions?

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #967 on:** December 06, 2021, 15:22:01 »

I bought and paid for a book on the internet months ago.
It was called "How to scam people online".
I've still not received it!

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #968 on:** December 06, 2021, 15:25:36 »

I was walking down the road this morning when someone threw a bottle of Mayonnaise at me!
I was like "What the Hellmann"!

Mr Nick · « **Reply #969 on:** December 06, 2021, 19:43:35 »

I've come to the conclusion that my mind is like an etch-a-sketch: one shake of my head & I forget everything...

Joe Rocket · « **Reply #970 on:** December 06, 2021, 22:27:01 »

That caused so much grief last year, so hold on to your hats.

Oh, that one again.

Bravo!

Can't have funny Brexit jokes though.

kwackboy · « **Reply #971 on:** December 09, 2021, 14:18:28 »

My friend's other half has fallen off a boat in Venice and drowned.

I've sent my gondolances ....

MartinW · « **Reply #972 on:** December 13, 2021, 11:42:14 »

I just switched all the wrappers around in a tin of Celebrations.

My Wife wasn't happy and got her Snickers in a Twix.

Mr Nick · « **Reply #973 on:** December 13, 2021, 17:19:44 »

For her birthday, I took my wife to an orchard and we stood there looking at trees for an hour.

Not the Apple Watch she was expecting apparently.

V-Twin · « **Reply #974 on:** December 13, 2021, 17:40:49 »

Did you hear about the Italian Chef who died?

He pasta way.

I sold my vacuum cleaner the other day....all it was doing was collecting dust.

Barbel Mick · « **Reply #975 on:** December 13, 2021, 17:53:29 »

I'm hoping my mate’s girlfriend gets back from the Ukraine before 25th December...
No one wants a chick in Kiev for Christmas...

Dark-Strom · « **Reply #976 on:** December 14, 2021, 00:24:17 »

Did you hear about the bloke that robbed a Formula 1 driver at 200mph, amazing what Red Bull can do for you..

mr_diver · « **Reply #977 on:** December 14, 2021, 07:07:38 »

Dark strom...

That sort of funny joke has no place on this thread (really BAD jokes)

kwackboy · « **Reply #978 on:** December 14, 2021, 09:19:54 »

2112 · « **Reply #979 on:** December 14, 2021, 17:05:35 »

I was playing air drums to Rush on the way home from work when a stick flew out of my hand. I had to change to Def Leppard...