Author Topic: TOP TIPS (things not to do...) (Read 5130 times)

Strommer · « **on:** August 30, 2011, 19:25:53 »

When removing a Datatool alarm - why not pick up the soldering iron by the wrong end and see how closely you can emulate the sound of the alarm you have just failed to remove....

Typed one-handed.... :limp:

Scudnut · « **Reply #1 on:** August 30, 2011, 19:31:42 »

choppsie · « **Reply #2 on:** August 30, 2011, 19:58:01 »

I managed this when I was a techie in the forces, only did it the once, lesson learnt - bl00dy hurts

Juvecu · « **Reply #3 on:** August 30, 2011, 20:10:46 »

Worst I burned while soldering was when I was doing a project for my electrical subject at school. Was sitting at an old wooden table that had we had widened by screwing on two planks to each side. There were slits in between the planks and I was working over them, I was wearing shorts. I had soldered a component the wrong way around and was trying to get the solder off to get it out. Heated it up well and tapped it on the table with the idea that the solder would splash onto the table. It fell through one of the slits and onto my left upper leg! I had the project in the one hand and the hot soldering iron in the other and had to put them both down to get up from the chair. By that time the solder had burned a hole with a 4mm diametre into my leg and cooled off enough to go solid again. The smell of burned hair and flesh was in the air, accompanied by a constant string of profanities. I dug a fairly round ball of solder out of my leg with small long nose pliers and had a hole that was neatly sealed from the burning, no blood at all. Burned like hell for a few days and the hole only fully healed weeks later. I still have a feint scar from it. Top of my list of things not to do again, ever! I was very lucky that my aim was so bad, I only got the leg

frez · « **Reply #4 on:** August 30, 2011, 20:18:23 »

OK, I have several bike related ones I have fallen foul of:

Don't forget to tighten your mirror mount after moving it.

Don't forget to remove your u-lock before riding off.

When changing the oil and filter don't start the engine thinking you have put the oil in already when you haven't.

Don't ride for 30 miles on the motorway at 100mph whilst being followed by an unmarked police car.

Don't filter through a narrow gap, clipping your top box on the back of a truck so hard it flies off.

Don't overtake when there is slush down the centre of the road or the rear will step out necessitating a bit of motorcross style riding on your sports tourer.

Don't let your fingers slip off the clutch lever whilst going for an overtake so you pull an unexpected wheelie.

choppsie · « **Reply #5 on:** August 30, 2011, 20:35:40 »

Locky · « **Reply #6 on:** August 30, 2011, 20:42:31 »

don't forget to put you stand down before you get off..
I done this outside the newsagents on my commute to work about 10yrs ago , the bike was a BMW K1100RS , I just got off it and walked away and for that split second I knew what id done , the bike just bounced off the floor !
A nice chap who was passing helped me get it back up . So embarassing as it was next to a busy roundabout ..Bike needed new side and upper panels and mirror ..!!!!

frez · « **Reply #7 on:** August 30, 2011, 20:52:47 »

Oh that reminds me of another...

When you break down on the motorway, don't put your r1100rt on its side stand pointing down hill with your helmet on the seat while you go and use the roadside phone. An artic will pass in lane 1 and the turbulence will have your bike roll off its side stand and your helmet will roll into lane 1 to be run over by the next artic. So a reg rec failure turned out to be a whole lot more expensive that it might have been otherwise.

Dracula · « **Reply #8 on:** August 30, 2011, 21:06:42 »

Never fit nice colour coded dust caps from halfords!!!!

Still not got the buggers off.

Juvecu · « **Reply #9 on:** August 30, 2011, 21:47:10 »

doebag · « **Reply #10 on:** August 30, 2011, 22:12:01 »

Quote from: "frez"

When changing the oil and filter don't start the engine thinking you have put the oil in already when you haven't.

Likewise, do not forget to put the engine filler cap back on.
My garage wall still has a nice stain of 10/40 semi synth up it

Abercol · « **Reply #11 on:** August 31, 2011, 10:50:48 »

Quote from: "frez"

Don't ride for 30 miles on the motorway at 100mph whilst being followed by an unmarked police car

Yup...I did that one, but at over 125mph. Trying to clear a misfiring coil on my CB900 (a good blast would drive out the moisture and normal service would be resumed). And it was a fully marked BMW M3 - with its blue lights on and all...blind? me? nah....

Totally chuffed when they let me off with a warning as they'd really enjoyed my "shit my pants in 0.3 secs" look and near-death wobble as I spotted them in my blind spot as I did a lifesaver before overtaking a truck.

Especially as their colleagues had already given me a ticket for 96.5mph on the same road 3 days before...."you were doing a lot more than that so be grateful" they said. Sigh.

gbrchill · « **Reply #12 on:** August 31, 2011, 11:27:59 »

Another soldering iron one - remember that the handle is the cold end and don't leave it on the floor when walking around bare footed!

Also, nuts never ever roll and bounce very far if you don't catch them as they come of their thread. So don't worry about having a tidy work area or doing the last little bit by hand.

Also, the hot bits are never ever hot enough to do any damage, so don't worry about them being hot - they only ever get a little bit warm.

Chris

Abercol · « **Reply #13 on:** August 31, 2011, 11:38:41 »

Don't put the freshly opened 5ltr tin of gloss on the chair in your newly carpeted dining room, then reach for a chair to stand on to do the picture rails....

Don't snog/fondle your girlfriend outside her house and shout abuse at the old, dirty, lowlife scummy perv who's obviously needing to get laid as he's looking too closely - only to find out he's her father...I really liked that girl and that was the last time I saw her

Don't give your first wife crabs....don't give your second wife thrush...Now on third wife.

jonH · « **Reply #14 on:** August 31, 2011, 12:08:46 »

don't bleed your mountainbike disc brakes in the living room.. with nothing protecting the carpet..

frez · « **Reply #15 on:** August 31, 2011, 12:19:43 »

Quote from: "Abercol"

Especially as their colleagues had already given me a ticket for 96.5mph on the same road 3 days before...."you were doing a lot more than that so be grateful" they said. Sigh.

I got "We'll just do you for the slowest we measured you at, 98mph, fixed penalty OK for you?". They did say that in spite of the speed I was riding safely...

Strommer · « **Reply #16 on:** August 31, 2011, 12:22:53 »

Bored of all that tiresome clutch action?

Why not move your left-hand mirror further along the handlebars to the right. Changing gear is now clutchless as the flippin' lever is attched to the mirror....doh!

Piglumps · « **Reply #17 on:** August 31, 2011, 13:30:14 »

Don't try to beat the Americornisms filter!

Strommer · « **Reply #18 on:** August 31, 2011, 13:43:00 »

Golly Gee - whazzup wit da yank filter? Hot diggety-dawg!

Dracula · « **Reply #19 on:** September 02, 2011, 21:09:42 »

One I forgot,
When wearing a flip front helmet, never leave it on and have a fag, then drop the front with said fag still lit in mouth.
The scar on the chin can last for ages!